Talking Hearing Loss

Imagine this: You’re having a conversation, and the other person asks you to repeat yourself because they didn’t hear you the first time. Instead of repeating, you respond with a dismissive “Nevermind.” This common scenario might seem trivial to some, but for someone with hearing loss, it can be deeply frustrating and disheartening.

Trying to be understood by someone with a hearing loss can be frustrating. Trust me, I know! However, as frustrating as it is for you, it’s doubly frustrating for us. We know you’re saying something and we know you’re struggling to make yourself understood and we also know that you’re getting hot around the collar…but we still can’t understand what you’re saying. I promise you though, we are trying as hard as we can!! 

In this situation, just about the worst thing you can say to us is ‘never mind’, ‘don’t worry about it’ or ‘it doesn’t matter’. This sends the message that you have given up on us.

If you’re a parent and your child’s teacher gave up on them because they found it hard understanding the lesson how would that make you feel?

It’s no different when it comes to someone with a hearing loss. To put it into perspective, to have hearing loss can be a bit like discovering that you’re slowly unlearning your native language and there’s nothing you can do about it. Words with completely different meanings begin to sound the same; while you can hear the words being said, the sentence sounds like nonsense because the words you ‘hear’ don’t logically fit together.

Or another way to put it, when I struggle with understanding someone it can be because it sounds to me like they are speaking with their mouth full of food or speaking while holding their tongue or speaking while they are congested or often all 3 at the same time.

Here’s why you should never say “Nevermind” to someone with hearing loss.

It Feels Exclusionary

When you say “Nevermind,” you’re effectively excluding the person from the conversation. For individuals with hearing loss, understanding and participating in conversations already require extra effort. Dismissing their request to repeat yourself can make them feel left out and undervalued.

It Undermines Their Efforts

People with hearing loss often put significant effort into communicating effectively. They might use hearing aids, lip-reading, or other strategies to follow conversations. Saying “Nevermind” dismisses these efforts and can be interpreted as you not valuing their attempts to stay engaged.

It Sends a Message of Inconvenience

When you opt for “Nevermind,” it can come across as if repeating yourself is too much trouble. This not only feels disrespectful but can also make the person with hearing loss feel like a burden. Communication is a two-way street, and both parties need to make an effort.

It Can Lead to Misunderstandings

Communication is crucial in building and maintaining relationships. By not repeating yourself, you risk the person missing out on important information, leading to potential misunderstandings and a breakdown in communication.

It Impacts Self-Esteem

Repeatedly hearing “Nevermind” can take a toll on an individual’s self-esteem. It can make them feel less competent and confident in social situations. Over time, this can lead to social withdrawal and isolation.

It Reflects a Lack of Empathy

Empathy is about understanding and sharing the feelings of another. By saying “Nevermind,” you show a lack of empathy for the unique challenges faced by people with hearing loss. Instead, repeating yourself or finding another way to communicate the message can show that you care and respect their needs.

Instead of saying “Nevermind,” consider these alternatives:

• Repeat Clearly – Repeat your statement clearly and possibly slower, ensuring the person can lip-read or catch your words better.
• Rephrase – Sometimes rephrasing the sentence can make it easier to understand.
• Write it Down – If verbal communication continues to be difficult, writing it down can be a helpful alternative.
• Use Gestures – Non-verbal cues and gestures can sometimes bridge the gap in communication
• And please don’t forget to try to stay patient and remain calm.

Respectful communication is essential in every interaction, and it becomes even more critical when interacting with someone with hearing loss. Saying “Nevermind” may seem harmless, but it can have significant negative impacts. By making a conscious effort to repeat yourself and ensure understanding, you not only facilitate better communication but also show respect and empathy. Remember, a little patience can go a long way in making someone feel included and valued.