Talking Hearing Loss

It’s been well over 30 years since I discovered I had hearing loss; I have spent the majority of my life dealing with hearing loss in one way or another and I have experienced every level of hearing loss severity along the way. It has been a long and difficult journey which still upsets me to this day when I think back upon the hearing loss hell that I went through. There were many changes that I made to conquer my hearing loss; the biggest of which quite simply ACCEPTANCE. I finally accepted that unless I took control, my hearing loss would continue to control me; and from that point forward I began to experience life after deaf.

The first step was allowing myself to fully grieve for the loss of my hearing.When I look back now I can see that I actually went through the 5 stages of grieving; Denial (I stayed in this state for far too long), Anger, Bargaining, Depression and finally Acceptance. 

I would get very bitter because it felt like nobody knew what I was going through; I just wished someone would understand. In hindsight, how could I expect others to understand what hearing loss was like when they had no way of understanding. It was up to me to help them to understand and the only way I could do that was to talk about it.

I had wasted many many years letting my hearing loss hold me back and I’m sure there were life experiences I missed out on because of that. I made a choice to live my life as fully as I could, hearing loss or not. Rather than looking at my hearing loss as an affliction that I had, I incorporated it into who I was. It was no longer my weakness but rather my greatest strength.

My hearing loss led me to a very different career path to the one I started on. At Blamey Saunders hears, I have found something that I love doing and something that my experience has made me an expert of. I am able to share my experiences, mistakes and advice to many people with hearing loss so they don’t have to go through the struggles that I did.

I have spoken at a number of public events (some of which were hosted by Cochlear) where I have shared my story, my struggles and my recovery from hearing loss.

I often get approached by people who see my cochlear implant and ask me for advice, either for themselves or for a loved one. One or twice, I have bumped into these same people again later and they have told me how beneficial my advice was.

My cochlear implant has undoubtedly made the biggest difference because it allowed me to hear things that I would have never been able to otherwise. There are some things, however, that I still find challenging, even with my bionic hearing. This is where my love for technology comes into play and in most cases I have been able to find ways to augment my hearing further via some additional gizmo.

I have a device at work that allows me to stream phone calls directly to my hearing aid and cochlear sound processor. This setup works so well that I was able to expand my job role; spending 2-3 days a week in our busy teleaudiology call center.

My smart watch alerts me of incoming phone calls and notifications so I no longer have to be stressed about not actually ‘hearing’ them.

Hearing loss is often referred to as the ‘hidden’ disability, it’s probably also the most misunderstood. Because of this, there is a massive stigma around hearing loss which can be difficult to break through. I certainly gave into the stigma for a long time. Hearing loss is not something to be hidden or ashamed of. It does not make you less of a person. You are not broken and your hearing loss should not be looked at by you or those around you as something that needs to be ‘fixed’. I am still deaf; I have just chosen to reject the stigma associated with this and put a new face to hearing loss; my own!

Nearly 2 years ago, I collected a list of some of the common stigma surrounding deafness and made a video titled “… I am deaf” in an attempt to break through as many of them as possible. I’m still getting feedback from people around the world telling me how the video perfectly expresses some of the things they would love to be able to tell people.

On Tuesday, 25th February 2020, to coincide with World Cochlear Implant Day, Cochlear Australia hosted an event at which cricketer and Cochlear Ambassador, Brett Lee and Professor Graham Clarke, inventor of the multi-channel cochlear implant, were guests of honor. I was fortunate to be invited to this event and was blessed to meet with Professor Clarke. It has been my dream for a long time to meet him as I had a few words I wanted to say to him. I shook his hand and gave him my most sincere thanks because my life has changed so much for the better since I had my cochlear implant. I truly felt like I had met one of my heroes.

My story started with my mother so it’s kind of ironic that it ends with her also. Having seen the positive impact my cochlear implant had upon me, mum decided (after managing for over 50 years with profound hearing loss) to investigate whether a cochlear implant could benefit her. Not only was she found to be a suitable recipient but she was also invited to become part of a research study of the totally implantable cochlear implant being run by Professor Robert Briggs. She received her cochlear implant on 28th May 2019 and her switch-on date was 17 June 2019. While it’s still early days, she has been getting very good results so far.

I am experiencing LIFE AFTER DEAF! There is no other way to describe it. I am hearing better now than I have for most of my life. I am happier, more confident and feeling more empowered than I have in as long as I can remember.  I have gone from an angry and bitter teenager who tried to hide his hearing loss to a confident and proud hearing awareness advocate and a voice for those with hearing difficulties.

My only regret it is that I didn’t do it sooner!

[ Part IV ]